Overheard in Waziristan

This just released: an aid worker in the Waziristan region overheard this conversation in a cafe and recorded it secretly on her cellphone.

"...they've spent over two billion US dollars on the things now."

"But surely they cannot use them."

"Indeed. They are using them. Our friend Umar has achieved what no one in history could. Sheer genius."

"Yes, I was skeptical. It seemed so demeaning to hide explosives in his underwear. Surely the American devils would win the propaganda war over that one."

"And instead, he has accomplished all that we hoped! The American people are degraded and humiliated. Each one must agree either to appear nude or to have their private parts groped by a stranger."

"I don't know why I doubted you. When Richard Reid's little drama caused the Americans to force every flier to remove their shoes, it was clear the direction we should go."

"It's so funny that years ago we thought we actually had to blow something up to destroy America. Don't you think it's so much more fun planning these little dramas and watching the Americans react?"

"Of course. And now, have you heard? Apparently they've discovered that American men have blurry groins. Not really men at all."

"So it's time to plan our next little charade. What shall it be?"

"Omar thinks we should plant something in a body cavity. But I think there's something better."

"Go on."

"The airport shtick is getting old. Let's send a phony underwear bomber to a big church -- a woman this time. Let her be caught and watch the Americans begin groping each other in the pews."

"Excellent! It's really much too easy."